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I went to CBGB Fest this past weekend and it was very rad. So many bands, too many bands actually. There were three stages all going at once, so I missed like 14 of them. But no regrets, as I finally saw the legendary Iggy Pop live (as well as a bunch of other great acts).
Random Thoughts
It’s been a week. I’ve been torn on what to write about this week. There are three things pulling me in different directions.
1- The Big MAGA Military meeting:
Trump/Hegseth had themselves a little meeting with hundreds of military leaders the other day where they said a bunch of fun moronic nightmare-ish things like, “no more fatties,” and “let’s practice being a military by invading American cities.” There’s a lot more and I had a lot of backlash-type-anger about it all but I’m mostly over it now. But if our military is gonna take any kind of physical fitness advice from anyone, I don’t think it should be from an administration led by President Big Mac.
Also, this is all noted and if they ever institute another military draft that for some reason would include 45-year-olds, I will start packing on the pounds like cool kids used to run to Canada in the 60s.
2- The announcement that Bad Bunny is gonna be the Super Bowl half time act:
I have almost no opinion on this really. I’m not a Bad Bunny fan (or a hater, just completely neutral) but that doesn’t mean I don’t get it. This was one of those cases where I wanted to backlash against the backlash. Anyone who has beef with the Bad Bunny pick is not paying attention. Bad Bunny is huge. It’s like Taylor Swift, Bad Bunny, and then everyone else. The Superbowl halftime is a big deal and should want to land arguably one of the top two or three most popular pop acts on the planet. Anyone who doesn’t understand this is blinded by stupidity or maybe they’re just old and out of touch, and if it’s the latter, hey, it happens. Feel free to turn your TV off for thirty minutes and go outside.
A part of me hopes he sings/talks/raps completely in Spanish, not one word in English, just to stick it to all the MAGA asshats. Whether he’s about that life or not, that would be some real punk rock shit.
Generally speaking, I’m mostly easy going/apathetic when it comes to who they pick for the Superbowl halftime show. They’re not gonna pick a band I enjoy so it’s beyond me to get bent out of shape about it. I don’t think millions of people will wanna listen to a reunited NOFX which would be my go-to #1 pick for that spot. I guess we should all rejoice that I’m not the one in control here.
3- Me at CBGB Fest:
There were three stages…. the main stage with the bigger bands, the Hilly stage (named after CBGBs founder and owner Hilly Kristal, may he rest in punk), and the Young Punks stage. I spent most of the day/night at the main stage (with my homie, Amanda. Gen X represent). Actually, we were surrounded by Gen-Xers it seemed. That was probably the age-appropriate place where we belonged. And I have no regrets because I saw a lot of legendary bands. It was a very fulfilling roster.
But I couldn’t help but feel like just a bit of a poser. The Hilly stage was where all the old school hardcore bands were at. That was probably where the true spirit of CBGBs was the strongest and most authentic. As much as I would’ve loved to bop around and get noisy with the likes of Murphy’s Law and the Cro-Mags, acts like Jack White and Iggy Pop were just too huge on my live music checklist to ignore.
I made it out to the Young Punks stage briefly for two occasions (Lambrini Girls and Destroy Boys) and it was cool. The vibe was younger, more energetic, and more chaotic. There was moshing and crowd surfing and all sorts of youthful exuberance. It was enjoyable as a spectator, but age-wise, I felt like maybe I did belong with the masses at the much more mellow Main Stage.
I think being a poser is relative or maybe it’s a spectrum. I can feel like a poser for hanging out at the Main Stage but there’s so many people who have no idea who most of those bands are either. I saw the Melvins and the Lunachicks there. If someone told me they don’t know of either of those bands, I suppose I could slander them as a poser, but I wouldn’t because I’m not 17 years old.
Either we’re all posers or there’s no such thing as posers or maybe the only true posers are the people who try too hard. I would have been a bigger poser if I went to hang at the Young Punks stage all day and pretended to be really into everything I heard. I probably would’ve ended up giving off NARC energy the entire time.
“Who’s that weird, old dude?”
“He must be a cop, right?”
“He doesn’t even know any of the lyrics.”
There was a time when I thought it was dumb to like huge pop acts. In my head, those were the posers, shelling out hundreds of dollars to go to stadium shows to watch insincere artists collect a major check at their expense. I was all about the small venues. I used to think that there was no passion at a stadium show. If you wanna feel the real thing, it had to be in a room that’s as close to closet sized as possible.
I’m kinda over that now. Maybe I got older. Maybe it’s age. Maybe it was Lady Gaga because when she hit me with Bad Romance, I was just like, “fuck, I like this, and I don’t care who knows.” And that’s helped open the door in many ways for me to be more okay with people liking artists whose names hang out at the top of the Billboard pop charts.
Plus, there is passion at the stadium shows. It may feel less sincere, and I suppose it might be. I don’t know… maybe it’s like drugs or sex or anything else in life that’s really enjoyable. Sure, I have my preferences on all those things, but even when it’s not exactly what I like, it’s still pretty good. Also, it takes an army of passion to make those shows happen. It’s the band, the crews, the dancers, the person at the concession stand ringing up an unending line of overpriced beer. The stadium show might be the mass-produced version of a live music experience, but it’s still a live music experience. Never take that for granted.
One more thing… sorta 3.5. Women to the front:
A thing I noticed at CBGB Fest, and this is only based on the seven or so bands I saw so please don’t take this as a definitive statement on all the bands there, but of all the bands I saw that day, only two of them said, “Fuck Trump,” into the mic. Both of those bands also happened to include women. I’m not gonna say I’m disappointed or dismayed that I didn’t hear any dudes say it… I know there’s dudes in bands saying it at shows (Green Day and Dropkick Murphys to quickly name a couple), it just didn’t happen in my presence at what was technically a punk rock fest.
And I think it’s very telling that bands with women seem to be louder and prouder with their “Fuck Trump” energy. President Big Mac is a dumpster fire we can all see and feel but women and minorities are closer to the flames. I don’t think it does the rest of us any favors to stand around and see that and not call “bullshit” out loud. When President Big Mac got elected (a second time) a lot of punk rock elders told us this is time for punk rock and punk culture. So, let’s go. Let’s be about it. Trump and punk don’t mix. The women know this, and I mostly think the fellas do too, they just don’t feel the effect of the flames yet.
-3.75 Tootsie Roll Pops (this is it, I swear):
Shout out to this dude Glenn me and Amanda met on the subway. We ended up taking the bus together and walking to the show and after we got in, he gave us Tootsie Roll pops and disappeared into the crowd. A random, rad act of punk rock goodwill deserves a quick newsletter shout out.
Iggy Pop is 78 and he hopped around the stage like a mad man for 75 minutes. It was incredible stuff. May he never find a shirt.
Movie I watched this week: Desperately Seeking Susan
I did my due diligence as a kid of the 80s and finally watched this cult classic 80s banger featuring a very young Madonna (pre-Like a Virgin). I thought it was gonna be super cheesy but was surprised to find the story very compelling.
It sorta feels like a fun female take on the whole ‘trading places’ scenario. Roberta is a bored housewife who looks at Susan’s life and sees something exciting and thrilling. But Susan probably suffers from a life that’s too exciting and it comes at a cost. Friends are made. Lessons are learned. There’s even a little death.
Also, fun cameo roles by Richard Hell, Steven Wright, and a young John Turturro who somehow looks older than the John Turturro of the 90s.
Documentary I watched this week: Trainwreck: Storm Area 51 (Netflix)
This was a fun two-part documentary about a Facebook event this dude Matty Roberts made that ended up going super viral. It was an event to storm Area 51, and it was sorta just a joke at first, but it picked up a ton of steam and seemed to be getting really serious. So much so that the military, FBI, and other law enforcement agencies started getting involved. The pressure gets pretty heavy for Roberts which leads to some interesting decisions along the way. But in the end, I think a real lesson learned here is that the kids just wanna have a good, weird time.
TV shows I watched this week: Jeopardy!
I watched some Jeopardy this week. Nothing crazy to report.
Album I listened to this week: Lighten Up / Bad Cop Bad Cop
One of my favorite band names in punk rock is back, it’s the all-female punk rock outfit of Bad Cop Bad Cop. This is a pretty fun album. It’s straight forward pop-ish punk rock stuff. A lot of the lyrical content seems to revolve heavily on self-reflection, self-improvement, and the struggle to be our best selves. There’s also a couple of really fun tracks to close this album out with ‘Dead Friends’ and a cover of the Joe Strummer and the Mescaleros song, ‘Johnny Appleseed.’
Book I’m currently reading: The Come Up (an Oral History of the Rise of Hip-Hop) / Jonathan Abrams
I finished this up this week, so you know what that means, I now know everything about hip-hop. Okay, not really, but overall, it’s a great recap of the first 30-40 years of hip-hop. It takes us from the beginning with Kool Herc’s parties in the Bronx all the way up to Kendrick Lamar being awarded a Pulitzer Prize for his album, ‘DAMN.’ My guess is maybe there’s not a ton of new material here for serious hip-hop heads, but for someone like me who’s only dabbled with the genre over the years, it felt like a great way to get more of a big picture view of the culture.
Random Sports Thoughts: WNBA Finals
If there’s one thing you can count on when it comes to me and sports, it’s that I have no idea what I’m talking about ever. I predicted that the Minnesota Lynx would beat the Phoenix Mercury, and I was wrong (Lynx were missing their all-star player, Napheesa Collier, during the final game but, no excuses. I was wrong).
The Las Vegas Aces beat the Indiana Fever but it took them a Game 5 overtime to do so. Plus, Kelsey Mitchell left the game early with an injury so who knows if the outcome changes if Mitchell was able to play for the entire game?
I think the Las Vegas Aces will beat the Phoenix Mercury in the Finals, but I’ve doubted the Mercury before and look where that got them.
But also, the Fever, if healthy next season, are gonna be really scary. With their collection of injured players, they had no business making it this far into the playoffs and being just an overtime away from the Finals. The entire WNBA should be on notice.
Random Pro Wrestling Thought
I’m glad that AJ Styles is getting a shot at facing John Cena during his retirement tour. I’m also glad that Samoa Joe is suddenly getting a title shot against Hangman at the next AEW PPV(WrestleDream).
It feels like we’re approaching a transitional era where we’re going to see a lot of the best dudes of the past 15 or so years start to wind it down and retire. I love watching these dudes get a chance to shine every now and again before it’s all over.
I think WWE has been a bit negligent in their booking of AJ Styles. But then again, you can’t book everyone well all the time when the roster is that packed. It’s cool to see him get this match. I don’t expect him to win but I do think that this is an opportunity for AJ Styles to have one of his best matches of the year and possibly deliver the best match of the Cena retirement tour. I’m not guaranteeing it, but the potential is definitely there.
As for Samoa Joe, you can push Joe to the top anytime you want. He’s always so damn believable. I also don’t expect him to win, but if we get a fun story and match out of it, all is well. Plus, it’ll be a formidable addition to Hangman’s championship resume.
Top 5 Bands I Saw at CBGB Fest
1- Iggy Pop
2- Jack White
3- Lunachicks
4- Melvins
5- Lambrini Girls
Weekly Quote
This week’s quote comes with a preface. This quote is from a writer who recently passed away, a writer I didn’t know about till I found out he died (in the Substack of one of his writer friends). It’s always a little weird to find out someone died and then suddenly deep dive into their stuff, but I did that with this dude, and I ended up enjoying a bunch of his articles and essays. Anyways, here’s the quote (it’s a long one):
“I also have advice. Everybody loves reading advice on the computer, so I’ll share it: the best thing you can do right now is log off as hard as you can. Go outside, talk to people in real life where it’s actually kind of rude to talk about the news, try to actually see the friends you usually just text message. Go for a long drive and turn the phone off while you do it. Get back into your hobbies or pick one and learn it for a while. Watch one of those studio movies that reviews called “wildly miscalculated” and you haven’t seen since high school. Play an album you like but find embarrassing. Go to free community events even if they sound stupid. If you take the freeway, try the surface streets. Go to a bad diner and just order some bad coffee because even bad coffee is good coffee.
You can’t help anybody when you’re exhausted and keep posting one million college-educated rewordings of “I would love to be dead right now” on the computer. Walk away from the thing and try out some of those normal things you hear about and if you get bored that’s wonderful because we’re not supposed to get bored anymore. It turns out boredom is the Cadillac of feelings.”
- Kaleb Horton
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Upcoming Shows
Tonight!
Fri, Oct 3rd, 11pm
Producers Club, NYC
I’m doing stand up and you get to watch a movie that I’m in for like 15 seconds. Gonna be a fun night!
Sat, Oct 4th
IT’S GINA’S 50TH BIRTHDAY!
This is definitely gonna be a fun one.
Fri, 10/24
NEXT HELL YEA! ALERT
Wawa Social Club
North Bergen, NJ
more info to come
Sat, 10/25
The Office
Guttenberg, NJ
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Thu, 11/20
