This newsletter is free however if you like the content and you think it’s worthy of any sort of gratuity, feel free to drop a donation to:
Venmo:
@joshwells666
or Cash App:
@joshaintfunny
No pressure. Now, on with the newsletter.
Going on tour with this elk. Check me out in your local city. (Gig at an Elks Lodge, thanks for the spot Gina!)
Gina is funny. Follow her on IG:
Random Thought
I’m not gonna do that thing where I call Valentine’s Day a fake holiday created by candy and card companies to increase profit. I’m not gonna tell you that if you really believe in love, then you shouldn’t need a designated day to express it to your significant other. Even if I believe these things, it sorta doesn’t matter. Valentine’s Day is here to stay. If you wanna be in a meaningful relationship of some sort, you might as well just go along with the current of society’s stream and dive in. There’s so much that’s wrong with this world and going after fake holidays is very low on my priority list. We should probably tackle things like homelessness and peace in the Middle East first.
And although I found myself single on this Valentine’s Day (not complaining, just stating.. in fact it’s kinda nice being single on V-day. All that extra V-day pressure doesn’t exist. It’s kinda liberating), if I did have a valentine, I think it’d be live music. So I took this chance to give my relationship with live music a review of sorts.
It’s been a slow start in 2024. December ended well enough. I saw the Bouncing Souls, the Slackers, and Gogol Bordello all in the same month, all insanely entertaining shows. But I’ve yet to see any bands live this year. It almost feels like January and February have been marked as a hibernation period for me. And I know it won’t last. I have a few shows lined up in March and my first foray into live music for the year is actually two days in a row (Porno for Pyros and Laura Jane Grace). So I go from famine to feast. I like to think that’s when the new year starts for me in terms of live music.
I also have a few big shows later in the year. None larger than what is possibly my white whale, the Rolling Stones. As a fan of both rock and roll and live music, this is a really big deal for me. I kinda can’t believe I’ve never seen the Stones. I blame that on a long period of my life when I thought stadium shows were stupid. I still believe the smaller venues are where it’s at and are a much better experience but I’ve eased up on my disdain for the big stages. What you lose in intimacy you sorta make up for in spectacle. But also, the Stones aren’t playing any small venues (or if they are, it’s probably $10,000 to get in and good luck beating the millionaires to the punch before it sells out). So this is it. Metlife Stadium, May 23rd. Probably the biggest event on my calendar for the entire year. I don’t know anyone who’s getting married, but even if I did, I’d probably still consider this a bigger deal.
I also got a ticket to see NOFX on their final tour. I went to Orlando to go see them on an earlier stretch on the tour last year. They hadn’t dropped all the dates they were doing yet and a part of me was worried they might not play the NYC/NJ area. They released those dates later of course, but no regrets. Orlando was fun, and now I get to say I’ll see NOFX twice on their final tour (or maybe more, who knows? They have three nights in a row in Brooklyn and there is an insane part of me that wants to go to Cali for one of their final final shows there).
These are just a few of the live shows I have lined up for the year. There’s more and as I’m typing about it, I’m finding myself in a better mood. I’m stoked on all this. Maybe I should’ve tried to push myself to go see some bands this past month and a half, but it is what it is. And maybe the absence has done me some good and now I’m filled with a sort of anticipation that maybe wouldn’t have existed if I did go to shows the past few weeks.
Also, cheap discounted chocolate the day after V-day is my boo.
And then there’s my furball valentine, Jinx. She’s a lot like me in that she can be cuddly for a couple minutes but soon after is like, “okay, leave me alone now.”
In bummer news, I lost Wordle today. Goodbye 192 streak. :(
Movie I Watched Recently
S.F.W.
(Prime)
Mark this down as a movie I can’t believe I haven’t seen before. It came out in 1994 and it feels very in line with everything I think the mid 90’s were all about. It’s a very fitting movie for grungy times. Also, the main dude in the movie, Cliff Spab, gives off serious proto-Tyler Durden vibes.
Okay so Cliff, his buddy Joe, and Wendy (who he didn’t know before the drama) were taken hostage in a convenience store by terrorists. There were 2 (or 3?) other hostages but they’re less important as characters mostly because they die early. The terrorists’ demands are that network TV airs everything they’re filming live. The terrorist org itself isn’t very fully developed in the story. We never find out why they wanted to do this or what their endgame was. They were just the vehicle used to get us where this movie needed to go.
And that’s Cliff becoming a national sensation. After 31 days, Cliff, Joe, and Wendy try to make an escape. Joe dies unfortunately but Cliff and Wendy get out of there and go on to become national icons. Cliff keeps a low profile at first while Wendy seems to hit the TV interview circuit hard.
Cliff becomes a big star because of his attitude during the entire crisis. He had one particularly memorable soliloquy where he looks into the camera and talks about his view on the situation and life in general. He says the term, “So fucking what,” a lot and that becomes a bit of a catchphrase and sorta encapsulates Cliff’s whole vibe.
Anyways, much of the movie is spent following Cliff and Wendy as they adjust to their new famous lives. Cliff is reluctant at first but then really starts to lean into it when he sees how into his, “so fucking what,” messaging people are.
The ending is a bit surprising and a total left turn but I dug it.
Cliff and Wendy are played by Stephen Dorff and a young Reese Witherspoon. Also, great soundtrack.
TV show I’m currently watching
My So-Called Life
(Hulu)
All good things must come to an end but some endings are more abrupt than others. MSCL ends with episode 19 and it’s not a season finale. MSCL was cancelled before they had a chance to even give the first season a proper ending so things ended a little messy. There’s a lot of loose ends and questions and things I wish I could’ve seen resolved.
None loom bigger to me than the friendship of Angela and Rayanne. Rayanne did Angela dirty by having sex with Jordan but I still wanted to see them somehow resolve their differences and move on. Angela may be the main character of this story, but without Rayanne there is no story. Their taboo friendship was the genesis of the whole thing. So whether they were destined to make up or move on without each other, I feel like that’s the closure this story needed the most.
Even though Brian wrote the letter for Jordan that won Angela back only for Angela to find out that Brian was the one who originally wrote it, I don’t see any possibility of Angela and Brian getting together. There were never sparks between them before that and they’ve known each other their entire lives pretty much. This show ended with Brian being my least favorite character. I don’t think he’s good for anybody. He needs to work on himself.
Rayanne is my favorite character but Ricky is probably the best of the bunch.
I probably could’ve used a lot less of Angela’s parents. They mostly annoyed me. I’m glad Angela’s dad didn’t cheat on Angela’s mom in that last episode though. That would’ve been a shitty move.
Rayanne’s mom was also cool. If they were gonna cram parental characters down our throats, we could’ve used a bit more of her.
A lot of the fashion and throwback nostalgia was fun. Just watching a show about grungy teens in the 90’s without cellphones was a trip for me. They probably could’ve done better with the music though.
So looking at some of the cast ages now, it’s kinda weird. I guess the teenagers are all supposed to be my age and Claire Danes is. But some of the cast members are like 6-8 years older than me while Angela’s little sister is currently 42 and only two years younger than me even though she feels like the most far away by age while I’m watching the show through my nostalgic teenage eyes.
I also feel like maybe when I watch shows like this I should somehow identify with the parents since I’m older now but Angela’s parents still feel way older than me and I think maybe that has something to do with the way parents were portrayed back then on TV possibly? Or maybe I just can’t stop experiencing the show through the eyes of my inner teenager.
Albums of the Week
I listened to two new albums this week. Both of them of the punk rock variety. Here goes, a tale of two punk rock albums:
The Sleeveens (self titled) / The Sleeveens
This album feels very punk in nature but I’m almost tempted to classify it as more of a barroom, working class rock and roll. It doesn’t hit you with the speed of most punk rock but the guitars and the vocals are rugged and gravely. It’s got a certain purity to it and lacks polish. Bare bones and heartfelt, the way good rock and roll music should be.
Sleeveen is Irish slang for trickster.
Blasted / Mean Jeans
On the other end of the punk rock spectrum, we have Mean Jeans (not to be confused with other bands with ‘Jeans’ in the name like, ‘Mom Jeans,’ or, ‘Pissed Jeans,’ or let me know if I’m missing any other Jeans bands…). This album is more of your silly, bubblegum type punk rock. Fun, punk rock music for wiseasses made by wiseasses. There’s a definite thread from the Ramones to this but at one point the vocalist references the band, ‘The Queers,’ and I was like, “yea, they sound a lot like the Queers.”
I do love that punk can be so much more than one thing and this was a great week to be reminded of that. Both these albums do different things, both of them good in their own way. I could like either album more than the other on any given day depending on my mood, but I would never want to disparage one to celebrate the other. They both serve a punk rock purpose.
Book I’m Currently Reading
Confessions of a Forty-Something Fuck Up / Alexandra Potter
So actually, the title on the book itself is spelled, “F**k,” but whatever, we’re not doing that. This is the Josh Wells Weekly and we freely use the f-bomb around here when it feels right.
Okay, so if you read the title I’m sure it doesn’t take a lot to figure out what drew me to this book. I myself at times feel like a forty-something fuck up, especially when you compare my situation with societal norms like family/houses/etc. So it’s kinda refreshing to hear from a voice that feels similar to mine.
Well, sorta similar to mine. I think I’m about halfway through and this book feels very chick-lit-ish. And that’s fine and well but I suppose there are times when I’m reading and I’ll think I’d like to see a similar story through the eyes of a dude.
But there’s a whole lot I do connect with here. Friends starting families. Adult gatherings getting weird. Feeling like an outcast. Finding online dating annoying. A disdain for toxic positivity. And trying to find a sense of pride in your situation and not allowing all this stuff to bring you down.
The main character, Nell, just started dating someone though at the midpoint of this book and I’m starting to think she’s gonna sell out and totally chase after what everyone else around her has. I guess we’ll see. It’s been enjoyable to see Nell represent this anti-normie way to live and I don’t wanna see her totally flip sides and become just another normie.
More to come…
“The new Bridget Jones for our time.” I’ve never even seen/read Bridget Jones but yep, this is definitely chick-lit.
Random sports thought of the week
The Super Bowl has changed for me so much over the years. The Super Bowl used to be an excuse to party. When I was young, my mom and stepfather used to throw great Super Bowl parties. Then when I moved out it felt like there was always somewhere to go to watch the big game and really just use that as an excuse to party.
But over the past few years I’ve stayed in and done nothing for the Super Bowl. Maybe I can blame it on the pandemic. But there just doesn’t seem to be any more parties or maybe I’ve just been taken off of the invite lists. Who knows?
But here’s the thing, I kinda like it. I actually enjoy watching the game. This is the culmination of the entire season. I really enjoy knowing what’s going on and hearing the commentary and following the drama closely as it unfolds on the field. It’s like the season finale of a really good TV show. I don’t know if I’d wanna be in a party atmosphere for something like that.
That all being said, I’d still take the invite. I’d still choose Super Bowl party over watching it alone. But it might not be like it used to be. There’s entire Super Bowl parties where I didn’t pay any attention to the game at all. The game was the least important part of the party to me. But now I might be the dude who wishes everyone else around him would take it down just a notch so I can get a better grasp of what’s going on in the game.
Anyways, I chose the Chiefs to win and they did so go me. But y’know, I’m no whiz when it comes to picking sports and there were a bunch of times during this game when I thought the 49ers were gonna prove me wrong. So yea, maybe I got this one right, but the more I write and make predictions about upcoming games, the more I realize how not good I am at it.
“INVITE JOSH TO YOUR SUPER BOWL PARTY NEXT YEAR!!!”
Random pro wrestling thought of the week
So currently in AEW- we’re booing the Young Bucks. We’re booing Hangman. Kenny Omega is out, maybe forever. The champ (Samoa Joe) is a heel. Mox and Bryan Danielson are heel-ish. Cody and CM Punk are long gone. So who is the face of AEW?
This is a very subjective topic but I think it’s Orange Cassidy. Orange Cassidy is everything AEW should be. He’s scrappy and unafraid. Always entertaining. Very chill and doesn’t allow outside noise to affect his mood. He’s cool. He’s an underdog. He’s something completely different to what we’re used to and most importantly, fans love to cheer for him.
His whole low-fi presentation is a symbol for doing more with less. His entrance graphics and pyro represent the idea that you don’t need a lot of flash to entertain. All you gotta do is connect with the crowd. Give them something to cheer for. Something to make them happy. Something the kids wanna dress up like.
In an industry that tells you to turn it up to 11, Orange Cassidy is possibly the most low energy total package in the history of pro wrestling. He turns the volume down and does his thing and keeps plugging away. There’s louder, bigger, and flashier… but somehow Orange Cassidy rises above all that and distinguishes himself and is probably the top fan favorite in AEW.
Orange Cassidy is the laid back hero we didn’t know we needed for these hectic modern times.
Top 5 Fake Holidays
1- Halloween
2- Mardi Gras
3- Mother’s Day
4- New Year’s Eve
5- The Daylight Savings When We Get An Hour Back
(Fake holiday = a holiday a decent job doesn’t give you the day off for)
Weekly Quote
“That’s all you gotta do, man. That’s all everybody’s gotta do is just say so fucking what. It works wonders.”
-Cliff Spab in S.F.W.
Thanks for reading!
Share it with your friends! Make sure to follow me on Twitter and Instagram:
@joshaintfunny
If you haven’t seen it yet, please go to Youtube and give my 40th birthday comedy set a spin, and while you’re at it, a like, a comment, or a share would be appreciated and goes a long way as well. If you’re feeling really crazy, hit subscribe… no pressure.
got a few other videos on my YouTube channel if you want to check them out, go here:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCRg2MM2mOOvh1JKnDatFiBQ
Upcoming Shows
TONIGHT!
HELL YEA!
Fri, Feb 16, 9:30pm
North Bergen, NJ
Sat, Feb 17, 8pm
Bergenfield, NJ
Sat, Feb 24th, 8pm
Bloomfield, NJ
Nothing is Sacred Comedy Show
Fri, March 1st
Carlstadt, NJ